


FYI: Nico's a Spy

by paralogism



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Explosions!, F/F, all the usual ships in the background, basically a yuri James Bond parody, chase scenes!, gadgets!, gambling!, glamour!, like you couldn't tell from the title, seduction!, spy AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-21
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-02-04 22:36:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12781077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paralogism/pseuds/paralogism
Summary: Nico's the coolest, suavest, Number One Spy in the Universe. Maki is the Bond Girl. And you can't spell evil without Eli.





	1. Introductions

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to lonelypond for throwing me some ideas when we first discussed this idea! And that was a long time ago, because of exams and essays and procrastination... y'know, the usual.
> 
> And sorry, I didn't proofread this the first time through. Hopefully I fixed them up before too many people noticed. 
> 
> No, I mean, what mistakes?

His foot flat to the floor, the sound of a screaming V12 wailed through the winding roads of the Swiss Alps.

The man looked in his rear-view mirror and gasped. What was left of his head start had disappeared, replaced by a very quick, very loud and very pink Aston Martin behind him, which regarded slowing down for corners as an interesting idea to try some other time.

He brought his eyes back to the road ahead - just in time to slam the brakes for the hairpin. His tyres made a small squeak on exit. His chaser drifted around the corner in a pool of smoke, tyres squealing for mercy.

With another panicked look in his rear-view mirror, he instead made a sigh of relief. Because now chasing after the very fast, very pink Aston Martin was a reassuringly grey helicopter gunship, loaded with two healthy racks of missiles either side. That would solve his problem.

Still looking in his mirror, he muttered a word which rhymed with duck, as he saw the pink Aston’s boot lid open and fire a rocket of its own at the helicopter.

Still looking in his mirror, his heart dropped as he saw the explosion.

And this time, still looking in his mirror, he forgot to look up and brake for the upcoming corner until it was too late.

The black Lamborghini hit the railing both side-on and too fast, and pitched into a barrel roll before gravity took over, sending the car roof first down a snowy bank. Embers were already visible from the car’s underside, along with a trail of petrol and fluids leading to the wreckage.

The driver’s door opened and a man crawled out onto the snow. They inched their way from the wreckage with a gun in their hand. And not a moment too soon, because the car then exploded gloriously behind him, causing him to drop his gun in shock and slide just out of reach.

The pink Aston slowed to a stop; its driver stepped out like they had all the time in the world. Her black hair tied with red ribbons either side, she smirked and drew her gun from her holster before making her way down the slope.

‘Who…’ he stammered out, now face to face with his imminent demise. ‘Who are you?’

‘You don’t know?’ she asked, haughtily. ‘I’m the Number One Spy in the Uni-‘

The man tried to reach for his gun discreetly, but all it earned him was a stamp to the wrist. He groaned.

‘How rude! Now I have to start over.’ There was a small cough as she cleared her throat. ‘The Number One Spy in the Universe, no one does it better than Nico Yazawa: the spy who loves you!’

She levelled her Walther at his head.

‘And you are… Well, you’re dead!’

A gunshot cracked, then silence.

‘And… cut!’

In an instant, the silence picked up into a hustle and bustle in the background as the "deceased" miraculously picked themselves off the ground with a helping hand from the actress. The director made her way over to congratulate the star of the show.

‘That was an incredible performance, Yazawa-san! It’s almost like you really are a spy!’

‘Um, yeah,’ said Nico, her smile not faltering. ‘Almost.’

‘Thank you so much for your hard work! I’m sure the music video for _Secret Activities_ will be a success! But can I just ask…’ the director dropped her voice to a whisper. ‘You’re on top of the world right now – you’re the Number One Idol in the Universe! Are you really sure you want to take a break now? What are you planning to do?’

There was a moment as Nico placed a hand to her chin and pondered over how to answer. She eventually settled for a wink. ‘Sorry! That’s classified information.’

With bows to the production staff and the other actors, Nico made her way backstage to her dressing room, where she flumped down into her chair.

‘I’m almost like a spy, huh?’ She chuckled to herself. ‘I think I can go one better than that.’

The director grabbed her laptop and set it on her table. ‘Now then, let’s take a look at the finished product…’

* * *

(If you’re curious, it goes something like Nico walking onto shot from the right-hand side of the screen from a camera angle which looks kinda like the barrel of a gun, before firing her gun towards the camera. And then the screen might go red, and the camera angle might sway back and forth before perhaps fading to black and into a grandiose pop song with lyrics vaguely foreshadowing the events to come, while guns, naked women and naked women _with_ guns all dance around in an avant-garde background...)

* * *

(Of course, it’s not exactly like that, because copyrights are pesky things. But you get the general idea.)

* * *

There are three constants in this world. The first two are death and taxes. The third is that whenever spies are involved in a story, they come in immaculately tailored suits.

Nico Yazawa was no exception to this rule as she stepped out of the taxi in an impeccable dark grey suit, decorated with designer sunglasses, a white pocket square and a salmon pink tie – more than ready for her first day of work.

Standing before a building which looked high-tech even by Tokyo standards, all silvery, shiny and sleek, Nico allowed herself a moment to take in the sight as people bustled by. But there was one recurring topic of conversation which she overheard. Her ears pricked at one which was particularly interesting.

‘Did you see Nico Yazawa’s new music video?’ asked an excited woman.

‘I did!’ her companion replied. ‘She’s amazing, isn’t she? Number one on the charts and beating out A-RISE, with the fastest YouTube video to reach one billion views…’

‘She’s UTX’s star alumni, with a waterfront apartment in Tokyo,’ the other added, a dreamy look in their eyes.

‘I wonder what she’s up to now… probably laying in bed with A-list actresses or the like.’

‘But idols have a love ban, don’t they?’

‘Oh, yeah. That’s one thing I don’t envy. Speaking of which, how about we get to some of our own “secret activities” tonight? It’s been a while.’

‘Oh, you.’ There was a shoulder nudge. ‘Absolutely.’

It was a good start to the day – and not just for Nico. With a spring in her step, she scanned her temporary ID at the door and was escorted into her first day as an agent of espionage.

There wasn’t any time for getting sidetracked. The first thing to do was report to M’s office to be briefed and receive her paperwork, both probably involving lectures about the fragile geopolitical climate and the importance of her role in maintaining safety and global security. The boring stuff Nico couldn’t really care less about, in other words.

Thankfully for her, her more productive ideas disappeared as soon as she entered M’s reception and saw a pretty woman humming to herself as she typed up notes on her shiny, metal desktop. Long ashen hair, tidy grey blazer, posture perfect.

As a professional, there wasn’t any time for getting sidetracked. As an idol, there was always the pesky love ban. But as a spy, there was _always_ time to flirt with the cute secretary.

It would’ve been the perfect time for Nico to make a stylish entrance by throwing her hat at the hatstand and have it land all nice and suave. But that would’ve required her to have a hat – and that would be a crime against modern fashion. Instead, the woman noticed Nico and stopped typing.

‘Ah, good morning!’ she chirped. ‘Can I help you?’

Years of idol training now came in handy, as Nico kept her voice low-toned and effortless, calculated for maximum flirting potential. ‘I’m believe I’m scheduled for a briefing with M, Miss…?’

‘I’m Kotori Minami, but my nickname is Moneypenny,’ she said with a smile. ‘I’m M’s secretary.’

‘Secretary?’ asked Nico, surprise in her voice. ‘That’s a shame. You’re wayyy too cute to be sitting behind a desk all day.’

Kotori giggled – light and sweet. ‘I don’t think my girlfriend would approve of such flattery, Yazawa-san.’

Nico leaned her arms onto the table, grinning as she met Kotori’s gaze. ‘And as for yourself?’

‘I don’t dislike it,’ said Kotori, winking.

‘I hate to interrupt such _professional_ behaviour in my office, but I think it’s about time Yazawa-san was briefed on her assignment,’ said a voice coming from the speaker on Kotori’s desk.

Sighing, Kotori pressed a finger to the intercom. ‘Right away, M. She’ll be with you shortly.’

‘Someone’s impatient,’ Nico said, annoyed at having a good flirt interrupted.

‘Don’t worry,’ whispered Kotori, gently placing a hand over the intercom’s receiver. ‘We can always pick this up later.’

(That was the moment Nico knew joining the secret service was the best decision she’d ever made.)

Looking to get the meeting over with ASAP to resume the more important stuff, i.e. flirting with Moneypenny, she stopped for a moment after ushering herself inside M’s office proper. It’s not that it was strange. Just unexpected.

The walls, the woman’s hair, everything was just so… purple, like a ripe eggplant. Some well cared for plants at the corner of the room, a few scattered comfortable chairs, and a plaque reading simply “M” on her desk.

Her long ponytail swished behind her as the woman stood from her chair to greet Nico. She offered her a warm handshake before inviting her to take a seat at the polished wooden table.

‘Greetings, Yazawa-san, and welcome to the Japanese Secret Intelligence Service! Is what I’d like to say. But I’m actually rather concerned. Can I ask why you thought it was a good idea to make a music video where you prance around “pretending” to be a spy, when you’re actually our newest agent?’

‘It was too good to pass up when I thought about it! Who doesn’t like slinky guitars and sexy women with guns! And besides,’ Nico’s tone turned dismissive, ‘it’s all show business anyway. No-one will think it’s actually real.’

‘And if they do?’ asked M, eyebrow raised.

‘Then I’ll just have to deal with the consequences,’ Nico replied, all confidence and self-assurance.

M made a disapproving look for a moment, before smiling and clapping her hands together to relieve the tension. ‘Confidence is a good trait to have! And besides, if anything goes wrong, it’s your funeral.’

Nico’s smirk turned to a grimace. ‘How reassuring…’

‘Now then, let’s get to business and discuss your assignment. Simply put, it’s the Russians.’ With a stretch of her arms, M settled more comfortably into her chair.

‘Not content with interfering in foreign elections and getting idiots elected as president, the Russians have returned to what they were planning before the end of the Cold War. That is to say, they’re planning for world domination. And this is the woman whose been doing their dirty work.’

Pirouetting her chair 180 degrees, Nico looked to the back of the room where a projector was set up. Definitely Russian, Nico mused – what with the blonde hair and blue eyes and being tall, long legged, plenty of assets…

Not like Nico was jealous or anything.

M continued her explanation. ‘The KGB’s top agent: Eli Ayase. Nicknamed the Fox, she’s clever, cute, and not to be messed with. And as for what they’ve been up to lately…’

Opening her desk drawer, M pulled out several dossiers and placed them before Nico. What stood out most was that they all had a certain bit of Cyrillic emblazoned on them.

_Проект Юрий_

‘The Russians call it Project Yuri,’ M explained. ‘Through coercion, extortion and a series of defections, they’ve obtained important research on exotic chemicals, neurological processes and rockets. It’s a little foreboding.’ Making a sombre look, she folded her hands together in front of her. ‘We lost a good agent to Ayase in getting these materials. But it’s still not enough. We don’t know how it all fits together, or what their plan actually is.’

Nico felt a lump rise in her throat. ‘This agent… Ayase killed her?’

‘No,’ replied M, ‘not kill. Ayase’s trade is seduction to obtain her information. She’s a whirlwind, leaving a trail of broken hearts and tear-stained pillows in her wake. Something we witnessed in person, as she also stole the access codes to our important databases last month.’

‘ _All_ of them?’ Nico was incredulous. ‘Who did she seduce to get all that information?’

‘Um… well…’

Now blushing for some reason, M shifted her shoulders and brought her gaze downwards to the table. Nico watched her, curiosity piqued.

‘So, that might have been me...’

Nico placed a hand over her face. ‘Oh for god’s sake.’

‘I couldn’t help it!’ M shouted, arms crossed in front of her. ‘I was tired and lonely from working all those late nights at the office, and suddenly there’s this beautiful, tall blonde who treats me right for once! How was I supposed to know she was a Russian spy only after our encryption codes?!’

‘It’s actually obvious when you think about it,’ replied Nico. 

‘But those _legs_. Elicchi was a ballet dancer and my god it showed-‘

‘Too much information,’ said Nico, eyebrow twitching. ‘Also, Elicchi?’

‘It was totally worth it; I’d let all our secrets get stolen again-‘

‘M!’

‘Huh?’ She paused, blinked a few times, and then seemed to snap back into reality. ‘Sorry. Lost myself for a moment there. As such, your mission is to track her, and figure out what they’re planning. And due to the gravity of the situation, we’ll be assigning you some special help.’

M pressed a button on the remote and the projector flicked over to the next slide containing a picture and vitals.

‘Maki Nishikino,’ Nozomi said by way of explanation. ‘Prodigious daughter of a family of doctors, top of her cohort at Tokyo University studying medicine. Already published several ground-breaking research papers at the age of 23. If there’s anyone in the world who can understand the Russians are developing and find a way to counteract it, it’s her.’

The lack of a reaction from Nico surprised her, so M turned to find Nico gazing intently at the screen, mouth agape.

‘Is something wrong?’ asked M.

‘No, it’s just…’

It’s one thing being prodigious, but how did this “Maki” get to be so pretty as well? And tall. But again, it’s not like Nico was jealous of that or anything.

‘It’s nothing,’ Nico said eventually.

M shrugged. ‘Ah, well. Your first task is meeting with her, so you can stare at her all you want in person as well.’

Nico’s reply was a faint blush. ‘I… I wasn’t staring!’

‘Suuuure. We’re just about done apart from the paperwork.’ M produced a sealed file from the desk’s drawer and handed it to Nico, who felt the weight of something solid inside. ‘Everything an agent needs: your gun, licence to kill, licence to sleep with beautiful women, and finally, your permanent ID.’

Removing the documents from the folder, Nico’s eyes settled on the small card which she fished out.

 

> _Yazawa, Nico_
> 
> _Japanese Secret Intelligence Service_
> 
> _Agent no. 25252_

‘Track Ayase,’ M concluded, her emphasis stern. ‘Don’t do anything stupid. I don’t want to lose an agent to her clutches. It’s a lot of paperwork. Plus if anything were to happen to Nishikino-san, her father has some important connections. Not that it’ll matter if the Russians get their way…’ She looked right at Nico, surveying her eyes. ‘Are you ready, Yazawa-san?’

‘Of course!’

M smiled. ‘Wonderful. We’ll call this Operation Hanazono. And since your first duty is to rendezvous with someone… well, I’m sure you know what that means. The garage is right next to the labs. Allow me to show you there.’

‘Great!’ replied Nico. ‘Just give me a moment.’

‘What so important that you don’t want to see your shiny new car?’

Nico replied as if it were obvious.

‘I have to finish flirting with Moneypenny.’

‘Ah, Yazawa-san!’ Kotori looked up eagerly as Nico exited the room. ‘What’s your assignment?’

Nico rebuttoned her suit. ‘I’m off to rendezvous with a Maki Nishikino, apparently.’

‘Ah!’ Kotori’s face lit up. ‘I know her – she’s an old family friend of ours. She’s a nice girl when you get to know her.

‘And when you don’t?’ asked Nico.

‘She might be a little brusque.’

‘If only they could all be as sweet as you, Moneypenny,’ Nico said, sighing.

‘Have a safe trip, Yazawa-san!’ Kotori waved her a fond goodbye. ‘Remember, I always appreciate souvenirs!’

* * *

Practically bouncing on her heels, Nico followed M down the hallway, ready to be introduced to her new vehicle. ‘Is it an Aston? I already drove one before, so maybe a Lotus would be nice…’

‘It’s more… Japanese,’ M said carefully.

Nico’s eyes lit up regardless. ‘A 2000 GT?!’

M sighed as she scanned her ID before entering the garage. With no easy way to do things, she elected to break the news. ‘Nicocchi, I’m sure you know that the economy isn’t what it used to be. There’s been a few budget cuts. And the Department wasn’t happy with footing the cost of our old fleet, so we had to make some sacrifices…’

Nico’s eyes went wide with disbelief as she checked out her new set of wheels. ‘Surely you can’t be serious?’

‘I am serious. And I’m Nozomi, not Shirley!’ M paused for a moment, before placing a hand over her mouth. ‘I wasn’t meant to say that.’

‘And now I see how our secrets got stolen,’ Nico muttered under her breath.

‘Whatever.’ M (or Nozomi, whichever) waved her hand dismissively, bringing Nico’s attention back to the car. ‘What do you think of your car?’

‘What do I think?’ Nico parroted with derision. ‘I think calling this thing a car is an insult to other cars.’

It was white, square and tiny: a metal tissue box with wheels.

Nico got the impression that she could tip it over by glowering at it hard enough, and she was trying her level best. What kind of spy drives a kei car?!

She didn’t hide the disgust in her voice. ‘Does it have any gadgets, at least?’

‘Oh, it’s got gadgets,’ M replied brightly. ‘It’s got all the latest technology, such as a reversing camera and blind spot indicators. It’s very practical!’

‘Does it have rockets? An ejector seat? Can it turn into a submarine?’

‘No, no and no.’ Sensing Nico’s obvious displeasure, M sighed. ‘Do you really have to complain about the car so much? I mean, it’ll probably be destroyed in a climactic moment anyway.’

‘True,’ Nico said after consideration. ‘Fine, I’ll take it. On one condition.’

Nozomi’s response was wary. ‘And that is?’

‘Make it pink,’ said Nico, already walking off in the direction of the laboratory.

* * *

The lab was the typical pristine white affair, though with a few patches amongst the walls – and sizeable ones at that. Probably from some prototype projects being run. Watching from behind, Nico observed a tall woman with long blue hair removing vials from a centrifuge. Dressed in a lab coat, she replaced the vials in their holders as she heard Nico approach from behind.

‘You must be Yazawa-san, correct?’ When Nico nodded, she made a polite bow.

‘I’m Umi Sonoda, nickname Q. Naturally, I’m the head of Q branch.’

Nico matched her bow, but her eyes strayed to the other occupant in the room.

A ginger haired girl, making vivid colours in a flask as she mixed their contents together. Umi noticed Nico’s reaction. ‘This is my assistant: Honoka Kousaka. Nickname R.’

The ginger looked up and beamed. ‘It’s a pleasure to meet you!’

‘Now pay attention, Yazawa-san,’ said Umi, voice sharp with the sound of someone who became weary of agents ignoring her instructions and using her gadgets for more comic purposes. ‘This equipment will be the difference between life or death out in the field. I cannot stress enough how important it is for you to listen to my instructions and-‘

‘Oooh, what does this button do?’ asked Honoka, her finger already in motion.

‘Honoka, no!’ Umi ducked herself and Nico behind the cover of the lab bench.

*bang!*

An explosion shook the lab, sending vials rattling and textbooks scattering. Not to mention the new, sizable hole in one of the lab walls. Honoka sheepishly rubbed at the back of her neck.

‘Umm… oops?’

‘Every time,’ Umi moaned, hand resting against her forehead. ‘She’s like this _every_ time. But don’t worry, I’m used to this. I won’t let it affect my work-‘

Another *boom!*, followed by Honoka shouting ‘whoops!’

‘The repairmen are on standby-‘

*bang!*

‘We have a good insurance policy-‘

*explosion!*

‘I’m so sorry!’ Honoka begged, facing Umi in a deep bow.

Umi’s patience ran out. ‘Tell me, Honoka: how are you still in this job?’

‘M said she keeps me around because I make everyone else look good,’ Honoka replied brightly.

‘That isn’t a compliment,’ Umi groaned in reply. ‘Yazawa-san, I’m going to need a lie down and some tea with Moneypenny. I’m assigning you one task: prevent Honoka from doing absolutely anything before I return.’

Nico saluted. ‘Roger that.’

‘Umi-chan’s always mean to me,’ Honoka huffed as soon as Umi’s footsteps were safely down the other end of the hallway. ‘Just because things tend to explode around me. Causation doesn’t equal correlation! Or was that the other way around?’

Nico almost felt sympathetic. Then she realised that she was meant to be keeping watch over Honoka, and stopping her from making things worse. But there were just so many red buttons, all just waiting to be pushed. And Umi never said anything about Nico herself... 

‘Say, Honoka,’ said Nico, as if struck by a sudden thought. ‘What does this button do?’

‘Mmmm,’ said Honoka, appraising the button with curious blue eyes. ‘I’m not too sure.’

The two took a moment to pause, turned to each other in perfect sync and grinned. ‘Let’s find out!’

* * *

‘Yazawa-san.’

Umi’s voice was ice-cold, as Honoka took to inconspicuous whistling in the background. ‘Is there a good explanation as to why my lab has been completely ruined in the five minutes I’ve been gone, despite my instructions?’

Nico did her best to look innocent. The task was made more difficult by standing amongst rubble which wasn’t there fifteen minutes ago. ‘I think it just came apart by itself, really.’

‘I could feel the building shake. From explosions, if I had to guess.’

‘Well,’ Nico said carefully, ‘Japan has a lot of earthquakes…’

Umi crossed her arms. Made a long, hard stare. Then she pinched the bridge of her nose with resignation. ‘Against my better judgment, I’ve decided to grant you access to our latest, most cutting-edge developments.’

‘Because I’m amazing?’ asked Nico.

‘Because M ordered me to,’ replied Umi. She opened a bench drawer and brought out two small objects. ‘I believe your trademark is your hair ribbons?’

Nico nodded, curious.

There was a swell of pride in Umi’s voice. ‘These are hair clips manufactured from a special high-tensile weave. Hold it like a throwing dagger, just like you were trained, and…’

With a quick motion, Umi drew her elbow back and let fly. The ribbon spun through the air with a _swish_ , before sticking into the wall at the far side of the room with a satisfying _thock_.

‘Eep!’

A few inches left of the impact was Honoka. She turned around to face Umi. ‘You’re so mean!’

Umi dusted down a lapel and ignored her. ‘…it makes for an effective throwing implement, capable of slicing through steel cable.’

‘Well, I’ve always liked to dress sharp,’ Nico quipped.

Umi also ignored the pun. Instead, she walked over to a different lab bench and retrieved another object: dull chrome colour, about the size of a paperback. ‘Now, I’m sure you’re familiar with this.’

‘A make-up case,’ Nico observed.

‘Correct. Except this one has a few tricks, to make your charms even more _irresistible_.’ Unlatching the box and holding it in one hand, Umi pointed out the gadgets in turn.

‘First, lipstick with the power to hypnotise when applied to the target – several colours. Then you have amnesia-inducing blush powder, your standard issue stun-gun mascara brush and… ah.’

Holding a miniature container in her hand, Umi turned to her assistant. ‘Honoka? Rapid expansion foam, quick escape smoke or the highly volatile plastic explosive: which one did you put in the eyeliner tube?

‘Ummm…’ said Honoka, placing a finger to her chin. ‘I forgot?’

Umi pressed both hands to her face in exasperation. ‘Good luck on that one, Yazawa-san.’

‘I have to find out for myself?!’

‘One last thing, Yazawa-san.’ Caught by surprise, Nico flinched as Umi drew close enough to whisper next to Nico’s ear. ‘Would you kindly stop flirting with Moneypenny? It’d be an awful shame if one of your gadgets were to malfunction one day...’

Nico stood bolt upright. ‘Y-Yes, ma’am.’

‘Good,’ replied Umi, smiling. ‘Then I wish you the best of luck on your assignment.’

Honoka perked up, energetic as ever. ‘Good luck, Nico-chan!’

Strolling her way through the exit with gadgets in her handbag and her new car keys in hand, Nico was sure the last thing she heard before exiting was the routine sound of something exploding, followed by a shout.

‘ _Honoka_!’

‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry!’

* * *

It’s a two hour drive from Tokyo to Numazu. Or it would be, in anything except the abomination Nico drove. But at least she could use the extra time to take in the soothing sights and sounds of the coastal beaches when she finally got there. Staring at the sand, taking in the sunshine... the car was slow enough that she might develop a decent tan behind the windscreen.

A high, ornate gate signified that she had reached her destination. One of the Nishikino’s holiday homes. If that wasn’t enough to demonstrate their privileged position, there was even a maid to answer the intercom.

‘Hello, may I help you?’

‘I’m Nico Yazawa – Nishikino-san should be expecting me.’

‘Ah, yes. Certainly.’

The gates parted and allowed her access. Nico found that the villa inside was as lavish as the exterior of the place. After she had parked her car in the garage (and very thankful to be out of the damn thing), the maid greeted her with a bow, before leading her Maki-ward.

‘The young mistress is currently in the middle of writing an important research paper,’ the maid explained. ‘She prefers writing here. There’s no distractions here, unlike in Tokyo. When she was halfway up the staircase, the maid smiled as something else caught her attention. ‘But I think she might be taking a break right now.’

Nico fell silent, hearing the sound of a piano played by skilled hands resonating down the hallway. An encouraging look from the made set her off to check things for herself.

The hallway was almost endless, but she finally found the source. She opened the door and there she was.

She found Maki in full flight. Just caught in the flow and letting the music course through her, as natural to her as breathing. Nico found herself mesmerized at the sight and sound.

With a delicate finish to the piece, Maki reclined herself and let loose a contented sigh.

‘Beautiful.’

Maki started before turning around. She warily eyed the stranger she saw. ‘Thank you.’

‘I’m not just talking about your playing,’ said Nico, taking a step forwards.

There was no reaction from the pianist. ‘And who are you, exactly?’

‘The name’s Nico-‘

‘Nico Yazawa?!’ An excited squeal interrupted their conversation. ‘Is that really you?!’

In the blink of an eye Nico found her personal space invaded by a bespectacled, brown-haired woman. Their noses touched.

‘Oh my god it _is_ you!’

Nico and Maki watched as the woman sprinted down the hallway, out of sight, then back clutching an armful of posters, CD’s, pamphlets, books – on second thought, it was more difficult to see what the woman _hadn’t_ brought over as she ran back to Nico.

‘Could you please sign my albums and my DVD’s and my posters and my shirt and if it’s not too much trouble can we please take a photograph together?’

‘Anything for a fan!’ replied Nico. She took the phone being offered to her and lined up a two-shot selfie. ‘You know the drill! One, two, three…’

They struck a pose. ‘Nico Nico Nii!’

The brown-haired woman took her phone back and marvelled at the picture. ‘Thank you so, _so_ much! Your new music video was incredible, I’ve watched it so many times, the song was amazing, I loved the part where you have the pink Aston Martin with the missiles, it’s so cool and-’

‘Hanayo,’ Maki said, placing a hand on Hanayo’s shoulder. ‘You should introduce yourself first.’

‘I didn’t even introduce myself?’ In an instant, she became all quiet and blushing from embarrassment. Where did the person from before vanish off to? ‘My name is Hanayo Koizumi. I’m one of Maki-chan’s attendants,’ she mumbled, looking down at the floor and shyly wringing her hands together. ‘Do… Do you remember me? I attended one of your fan meetings this year…’

Nico leaned in for a closer look; Hanayo fidgeted under the scrutiny. ‘Are you sure?’ asked Nico. ‘Because I’m sure I’d remember a cutie like you.’

‘C-Cute?’ she stammered. ‘You… do you really think so?’

‘It’s more than think,’ Nico said with a smile.

Maki cut in, her tone acerbic. ‘Very smooth, Yazawa-san. Sadly, she already has a girlfriend.’

‘Awww,’ said Nico, not bothering to hide her disappointment.

Hanayo giggled. ‘Would you like to meet her? I think she’s getting some exercise on the beach.’

* * *

Hanayo led Nico across the grounds to the Nishikino’s private beach as Maki trailed behind them. More accurately, Hanayo rattled off the hundred things she liked about Nico’s latest album and how amazing it was to be meeting the Number One Idol in the Universe while walking in the beach’s general direction. It was only interrupted when she pointed and said ‘oh, by the way, that’s my girlfriend over there’.

If Nico had to describe what she saw, she would have used these terms: a ginger-haired torpedo, swimming against the waves like they weren’t even there. When that torpedo noticed the figures appearing in the shore, she rocketed out of the water like she had afterburners.

‘Kayo-chin!’

The ginger hadn’t bothered to use a towel before launching into a hug and a kiss – but Hanayo seemed used to that as she hugged back. Rin nestled her head against Hanayo’s shoulder to greet the others.

‘And also Maki-chan! And…’ Gazing at the newcomer, she made a confused head-tilt. ‘You look familiar…’

Hanayo’s excitement returned ten-fold. ‘Rin-chan, this is Nico, in the flesh!’

‘Wow, so you’re Nico Yazawa!’ Rin said, bouncing up and down with excitement. ‘Rin’s been to a few of your concerts with Kayo-chin! They were all nyamazing! But it’s strange - I never expected that in person you’d be so much more…’

‘Breathtaking?’ Nico asked. ‘Beautiful?’

Rin beamed. ‘You’re much shorter than I was expecting!’

Maki tried and failed to suppress a giggle, as Hanayo gasped in mortification. ‘Rin-chan!’

‘I’m sorry,’ said Nico, eyebrow twitching. ‘I didn’t quite catch that.’

Still with a hand in front of her mouth, Maki spoke up. ‘You know Rin, she was hitting on Hanayo earlier.’

Rin moved across to place protective arms around Hanayo from behind. ‘That’s no good - we’re about to get married, and Kayo-chin will be Rin’s beautiful bride!’

Hanayo spoke up, timid but sincere. ‘What are you talking about, Rin-chan? You’re the cute one, so you’re going to be the bride, and you’ll have an elegant white dress.’

‘Cu… cute?’ stammered Rin. ‘No way! Kayo-chin is a million times cuter, so she’s going to be the bride!’

‘No, Rin-chan’s the bride!’

‘No, it’s Kayo-chin!’

‘Rin-chan!’

‘Kayo-chin!’

And so the two began a fierce argument as to why the other one was cuter and by how much. Having been interrupted before, Nico decided now was as a good time as any to break the ice with the princess.

‘So… does this happen often?’

‘They live in their own world,’ Maki said, a smile making a brief appearance before she coughed and folded her arms. Instead, she turned to Nico and took the opportunity to look her over without interruption. If she was impressed, she sure didn’t look it. ‘I wanted to say this before. Idol to spy doesn’t seem like a natural career progression.’

‘You’d think that, but a lot of things carry over. How to not stand out in a crowd, how to ward off pushy men, how to handle pretty girls with sharp tongues looking to cut you down.’ The last sentence was punctuated with a smirk at Maki. ‘It’s perfect preparation, really.’

‘Mmm,’ Maki hummed in response.

‘Not to mention that you have to be fit if you want to perform the choreography I do night after night.’ She made a show of putting her arms up and stretching. ‘I think it shows most in my abdominals. Would you like a closer observation, doctor?’

‘No thanks,’ scoffed Maki. ‘Do you really need to hit on every girl you meet?’

‘Yes,’ Nico replied. ‘That’s why I became a spy!’

‘Not that I care or anything, but you haven’t called me cute yet.’

Nico grinned. ‘That’s because you’re not cute.’

‘Oh?’ replied an unimpressed Maki.

‘You’re hot,’ Nico said, adding a wink.

Maki blushed this time, a finger going up to twirl at her hair. ‘S-Shut up.’ She turned her attention to the other two, still engaged in a furious debate as to which one was cuter. ‘You know you can both be the bride, right?’

They turned towards Maki. ‘We can?!’

* * *

The Nishikino family maid smiled as she surveyed the scene. The young mistress was getting some much needed human interaction, a nice change from secluding herself in her room and working on her research. And she was never that talkative around strangers, anyway. The newcomer just knew how to push her buttons (though she would never suggest such a thing out loud to Maki).

The chime of the intercom reminded her that, unfortunately, it was time to return to work. She walked to the screen, finding a motorcycle and its rider – quite short, actually – wearing light brown leathers and a matching helmet. Her visor was dark and drawn down.

‘Yes?’ the maid asked. ‘Do you have business here?’

‘A delivery for Maki Nishikino,’ she said, gesturing to the small satchel bag at the rear of her bike.

The maid eyed the unfamiliar courier and bike with suspicion. That said, it wasn’t untoward for the young mistress to purchase items online, especially as gifts for her friends…

‘Very well. I’ll be down to take the delivery.’

Beneath the helmet, the courier smirked.

‘What are you delivering?’ asked the maid, picking up the clipboard handed to her and preparing to sign.

‘Anaesthetic.’

The maid only had time to look up in surprise before the courier delivered a chop to the base of their neck, sending them falling to the ground with less consciousness than normally advisable. The gate creaked as the woman stood up from the bike and opened it wider. Her two companions rode through in an instant. Their leathers were purple and orange respectively.

Maki’s group fell silent at hearing the unexpected purr of motors, and watched with wary eyes as they approached.

Dismounting from their sports bikes on the sand, they moved across the beach towards the other group with purpose and menace, not bothering to take their helmets off. Clearly not a social call.

‘Expecting more company?’ asked Nico.

Maki shook her head. Rin and Hanayo shifted with unease.

‘I’ll take care of this,’ said Nico, taking a confident step ahead of the other three.

She was surprised as Rin stepped forward to flank her, her fists clenched as she crouched into a martial arts stance. ‘We’re nyaut Maki-chan’s bodyguards for nothing!’

And Nico was even more surprised to see Hanayo also walking forwards to stand right beside her, a bo staff wielded in her hands.

‘Um, Hanayo?’ asked Nico. ‘Where did you just get that-‘

‘I really hate fighting,’ Hanayo said, a nervous quiver running through the staff she held in both hands. ‘But the Nishikino’s trust us to take care of their daughter. So… I’ll do my best!’

The two charged into action, Rin leading with a volley of kicks to try and create an opening for Hanayo to strike. They occupied the attention of purple and orange.  

The brown-clad one broke away from the skirmish and headed Nico’s way instead. Nico scoffed.

‘Martial arts are fine and everything, but all I have to do is take out my gun, and then…’

She reached down to her hip. Then the other. Patted down a trouser leg. And then the other. Then she unbuttoned her suit jacket, checked her waist and finally her hip once more, her opponent closing in all the while.

‘Well,’ she said sheepishly, tossing her jacket to the side and loosening her tie. ‘It’s lucky I learned taekwondo.’  

One on one, Nico was wary as she sussed out her opponent. She also kept her peripheral vision on the other skirmish. The striking thing was the way they moved - more like choreography to a dance, weaving in and out of attacks and countering with lightening footwork. It looked familiar to Nico.

Too familiar.

‘Where have I seen those moves before?’ she murmured, still keeping herself out of range.

Not getting anywhere fast, her opponent showed their annoyance in kicks and punches becoming wild and inaccurate. Tried searching for a decisive blow.

And when that didn’t work out, they turned their attention to Maki instead, who was now isolated from protection. Nico clicked her tongue and sprinted to cut her off. The figure made another sharp turn.

Nico realised too late that she was only acting as a diversion.

Further down the beach, Rin and Hanayo had been separated. Rin held her own against one with ease. That wasn’t the issue.

But without Rin by her side, Hanayo struggled to keep up with her own opponent. She snuck around Hanayo’s strikes, before dancing her way into range and disarmed Hanayo, kicking the staff out of her hands. Hanayo turned to get away, but slipped on the sand.

Tall and intimidating, the purple-clad figure raised the staff above their head with both hands.

Hanayo shut her eyes and brought an arm up to defend herself.

‘Someone… Someone please save me!’

‘Just a minute!’

Eyes opening with trepidation, Hanayo gasped as she saw Rin leap high into the air, aiming a ferocious kick at Hanayo’s attacker. The latter brought up the staff to block the attack. It didn’t matter.

Rin’s foot broke through it and delivered a strike to the crown of their helmet. The figure staggered a few steps, before dazedly slumping into the sand. That’s when the fighting stopped, as the other two switched their attentions to recovering their stricken member. Nico moved to pursue them, but…

‘Rin-chan? Rin-chan!’

Hanayo and Maki hovered over a distressed Rin – tears in her eyes and a swollen foot Nico could see from metres away. Maki got to her knees, before she extended a hand and gingerly pressed it against the base of Rin’s foot. Rin flinched from the touch and groaned.

‘Hanayo.’ Maki’s voice was low. ‘Please go into the house and bring the first-aid kit.’

Hanayo sniffled and rubbed at her eyes and nose. ‘Y-Yes!’

The squeal of tyres and the ear-piercing sound of powerful motorcycles making their exit meant the assault was over. Yet Nico didn’t feel there was much to celebrate as she sidled beside Maki and dropped to her knees in the sand.

‘Is there anything I can do?’ she asked, quietly.

‘Call an ambulance, please.’

‘On it.’

* * *

After winding on a bandage with expert precision, Maki double-checked her work. ‘That should be good enough.’

‘Rin-chan!’ Hanayo went back to hovering over Rin. ‘Are you okay?’

‘I’m perfectly fine- ouch!’ Rin winced as she shifted herself and tried to stand up from the ground. With a gentle hand to Rin’s shoulder, Maki eased her back down.

‘Don’t get up, Rin. You’ve broken your foot in several places. I’ve bandaged it up and applied a splint, but you’re going to need to get it plastered up in our hospital.’

Unable to contain herself, Hanayo wrapped her arms around her girlfriend. ‘I was so worried about you…’

Rin nuzzled herself against Hanayo’s neck. ‘Kayo-chin…’

The two shared a tender moment between them.

When she was satisfied that she wouldn’t interrupt, Maki spoke up and drew their attention. ‘One more thing. Rin, Hanayo. You’re both relieved from duty. You are no longer my bodyguards.’

Hanayo gasped. ‘Maki-chan?!’

‘It’s all over now,’ Rin lamented. ‘Now Rin will live the rest of her life with a permnyanent limp, selling her body to make ends meet…’

‘Don’t be so dramatic,’ scoffed Maki, before softening her tone. ‘It’s because I hate seeing my friends get hurt over me. Especially when they have a happy, married life to look forward to. That’s why you’ll both be the housekeepers, taking care of this place while I’m away.’

Hanayo teared up again, touched. ‘Maki-chan…’

‘Maki-chan!’ Rin was so happy she almost jumped up; the three quickly held her back down before she could cause herself more damage. ‘Ow.’

‘So it’s fine if I get hurt instead?’ asked Nico.

‘Exactly,’ said Maki.

Nico rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to retort, before she felt a timid hand clutching at her jacket sleeve. She turned and found Hanayo. ‘Nico-chan,’ she said, as if anticipating Nico’s reaction. ‘I know she can be… a little blunt sometimes, but please look after Maki-chan for us. If something bad happened to her, Rin and I… we wouldn’t…’

Nico reassured her with an arm around her shoulder. ‘Leave it to me, Hanayo.’

The ambulance arrived, and Rin was loaded into the back on a stretcher. She was back in good spirits – almost like she had never been injured in the first place. Though that might have been the painkillers kicking in.

‘Don’t try anything funny with Maki-chan!’ she teased, addressing Nico. ‘She’s still pure and innyacent, you know! After all, she still believes in-‘

Hanayo quickly muffled Rin’s mouth. ‘Rin-chan, no!’

The paramedics closed the ambulance doors and then drove off, leaving Nico and Maki to stand there in bewilderment.

‘What was that all about?’ asked Nico.

Maki shook her head. ‘No idea.’

Things went quiet. Nico took the opportunity to reflect. After all that had happened, there was still a nagging question needing to be answered. ‘Is being attacked by bad guys a usual occurrence?’

‘Of course not,’ answered Maki.

‘Then, why…?’

Nico racked her mind. No motive, no identity. Nothing to go off other than a Kawasaki one of the three left behind. But those were things to check out later. Right now, they were both on the clock for something else.

‘In any case, let’s get in the car, Nishikino-san. We have a mission to get on with.’

As she walked with Nico over to the guest garage, Maki’s jaw dropped as soon as she saw it.

‘You call that thing a car?’

‘Just get the hell in, would you?’


	2. Okinawa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So an update in a few weeks became an update three months later, but there are reasons for that! They're just not very good ones! 
> 
> If you haven't already seen the brilliant art produced by the talented noelclover for this work, please view it! http://noelclover.tumblr.com/post/170219602447/commissioned-by-nicoismywaifu-a-work-for-their
> 
> And thanks once again to lonelypond for beta reading and offering suggestions! You probably already read their stuff if you're here, but read them all again!

Abundant with sunlight, humidity and temperature, the greenhouse catered to the needs of plants and not their human caretaker, as evidenced by the sweat marks marring the botanist’s otherwise white coat. She wiped at the sweat beneath the fringe of her shaggy, silver bob before setting to work once more.

The sub-tropical climate of Okinawa was well suited to growing a variety of flora, but that was about the only benefit of working there. With the facility kept both out of the way and under heavy guard as jealous protection of the Akiba Corporation’s industrial secrets, it made for a lonely existence. But that was okay. It was all worth it, because there was nowhere else that would have let her work on something quite like this.

The botanist took a deep breath, then another to settle herself before setting to work on the single, potted plant laid on the table in front of her.

Clear in colour, its leaves glistened in the light. Not because of any dew on its surface: it was its leaves themselves which caught and refracted the sunlight overhead. They sparkled like precious gems with a torch shone on it.

It was mesmerising. It was beautiful. It was also worth quite a few times her yearly salary. But more than that, it was the product of all her hard work: the product of long, lonesome hours spent in the company of things which lived and breathed but were somewhat lacking in the voice department.

She placed a thermomotor into the pot’s soil, took the reading when it had settled, then entered the information into the computer a few paces away. From the bench, she retrieved a set of secateurs and prepared to engage in something closer to open-heart surgery than just pruning a plant.

As she squinted her eyes and used all her concentration, it was easy for her to tune out the sounds in the background.

For instance, she wouldn’t have heard the access panel of the ventilation system being shifted from above her. Or the faint _swish_ of a carabiner rappelling down rope. And even if she were paying attention, the landing of knee-high boots behind her was silent.

Slow and deliberate, Eli crept her way towards her target. Chains of gold jewellery around her waist and neck refused to clink – her movement was that smooth. Like the material of her shiny black catsuit and matching hat (probably being the only person in the modern age to make a fedora look good). The shine of her glimmering red lipstick was almost like a beacon.

With a sigh of relief after completing her work, the botanist placed the secateurs on the table and took a step backwards. In doing so, she backed into something unexpected. Something warm, soft and… breathing? Was there something like that in the greenhouse before?

She turned and found a blue-eyed, blonde-haired, picturesque woman smiling brightly at her.

The blonde said, ‘Hello.’

The botanist froze and thought of an appropriate response to being confronted with an intruder.

Blink.

Blink.

Scream?

But Eli was too quick as she reached out and muffled the botanist’s mouth with a soft, manicured hand. ‘Now, now,’ she said, leaning close enough to tickle an ear with her warm breath. ‘The only screams I enjoy come from a beautiful woman in the bedroom. And for what it’s worth, I’ve already dealt with anyone who might interfere with our sweet moment together. So do you promise not to scream when I let go? It hurts my ears otherwise.’

There was a fearful nod.

‘Good girl,’ said Eli as she released her grip.

‘How did you get in?’ the botanist wheezed out, taking several gasps of air after Eli let go. ‘The guards…’

‘Them?’ said Eli, giggling. ‘Let’s just say they’re having sweet dreams of a cute blonde right now.’

‘The security cameras?’

‘Already taken care of.’

‘The attack dogs?’

‘Fed and petted, the cute things. So to put things simply…’ Eli placed a hand beneath the woman’s chin and brought it upwards, filling the other’s eyes with an icy blue gaze. ‘It’s just you and me, my sweetheart.’

That was reassuring, the botanist didn’t think to herself, still trembling with Eli’s hands on her shoulders. ‘Who… who are you?’

‘Me?’ asked Eli. ‘I’m someone who appreciates the finer things in life. Like the touch and feel of a woman dedicated to her craft. Someone like a PhD student from Harvard who was headhunted after their brilliant thesis for a remarkable wage, if we ignore the fact that your work is what makes the company hundreds of millions of dollars. But I digress. I’m someone who appreciates you, Rika Kamiya-san, one of the foremost, most brilliant botanists in the world. Even if nobody else does. And in particular…’

Eli leaned in once more, close enough to see her reflection in the other’s eyes.

‘I’m interested in the mind that’s cultivated the wonderful new plant species in front of you: _lilum vitrum_.’

The botanist gasped. ‘How do you know about all that?’

‘I may have taken a few files from my friends at the Japanese Secret Intelligence Service. But for all their information on you, they got the most important thing wrong,’ Eli said, moving to entwine her fingers with the other woman. ‘Your file picture does you a disservice. You really are prettier in person.’

‘Thank you,’ the other woman mumbled, before she looked down after she felt a tug at her gloves. She found that they had already been removed and set aside with care, before her hands were enveloped by soft, warm ones.

‘And you have such beautiful hands,’ Eli marvelled with sincerity. ‘No wonder the plants turn out so wonderfully with your care.

Rika gulped at the affection being spent on her. It all made for a sweet honey trap, drawing her into a sticky situation. She inwardly cursed the Russian for introducing another source of heat to the room, being the cause of her flushed face and accelerated heartbeat.

‘The file also never mentioned your relationship status,’ Eli continued, as if she weren’t actually noticing the reaction she was getting. ‘Is it a girlfriend? Boyfriend? Other?’

‘It’s nothing,’ the botanist lamented. ‘It’s part of the contract with the company, to make sure that no information gets leaked.’

‘Good idea… in theory, at least. I happen to believe that there are some things worth being fired over.’ Eli ran a hand beneath Rika’s chin, brushing it with a gentle stroke. ‘That there are some things which are too good to resist…’

Up close, Rika’s vision was full of high cheekbones, long eyelashes, refined facial features which just exuded beauty. She quickly gulped and diverted her attention; she couldn’t be attracted to such superficial features.

Instead, she looked down and focused on Eli’s ample chest which had felt so soft before; her thin waist, her grabbable hips, her long, toned legs and damn, that really wasn’t any better.

‘I really need that plant,’ Eli whispered, her voice dripping with syrupy, seductive tones which tickled against Rika’s ear. ‘I can give you anything you want. Including myself, of course…’

‘N-No!’ It came out as a squeak, her voice cracking. She cleared her throat and tried to form the words again. ‘No. I’m sorry. That plant is too dangerous in the wrong hands.’

‘Awww,’ said Eli. Once again, Rika was left with the slow trace of a finger along the underside of her chin by soft hands. ‘Playing hard to get is cute, but I need a little more than that.’

Eli decided to switch tactics.

‘It’s so humid in this greenhouse,’ she said. ‘You can see the drops of water condensing on all the plants. And this outfit is just so tight, and it doesn’t breathe very well…’

The botanist looked down. The she wished for her own sake that she hadn’t.

Oh. Oh no.

Did this catsuit _really_ have to be a front zip? Did she really have to be this pretty?  Who even wears catsuits, anyway?

‘Ah. That’s better.’ Eli sighed with content, before she levelled a sultry smirk at the other woman, seeing what had caught her attention. ‘You’re really not interested in little old me? Not just a little bit?’

Rika could feel all the resolve draining from her body as she once more looked into those sky-blue pools, too much for her to resist.

‘Maybe… maybe just a little bit, then…’

‘There’s a good girl,’ Eli said, giving a soft massage of Rika’s shoulders ‘Just relax. Relax and close your eyes. Every good girl deserves their reward.’

Was this an absolutely cliché situation? Yes.

Did Rika care as she closed her eyes? Not especially.

Eli leaned in with a swish, and there was a quick kiss. And okay, maybe a bit of tongue. And yet all that came to Rika’s mind was the fresh scent of roses. Which would have otherwise made sense, but it wasn’t something that was grown in the industrial greenhouse – and she knew that.

She opened her eyes.

Things weren’t right.

Why was everything becoming blurry all of a sudden? Her eyes were swimming and she couldn’t hold her head upright as she looked to Eli in a panic.

‘It’s the anaesthetic lipstick,’ Eli said, half-apologetic. ‘You’ll be up in a few hours, like the guards outside. I hope you have sweet dreams.’

She staggered a step to the left, then two to the right, before gravity began to take over in a real hurry…

Strong, warm arms wrapped themselves around her before she could meet the ground. Eli giggled to herself as she set Rika to the tiled floor with care.

‘Well, I _am_ used to women falling for me. Though I don’t usually need the help from those stolen blueprints…’

She had finally gotten what she had wanted, as she gazed at the plant in her hands. It was everything that she’d thought it’d be and more, the sparkle of the leaves in the light a finer sight than any jewellery.

‘Harasho,’ Eli breathed to herself, taking a moment to admire her treasure. But she couldn’t linger there forever, and her heels clacked against the hard flooring as she made her way back to her entry point.

She turned back as she attached the rope back to her carabiner and activated the miniature electric winch, sending her up in near silence.

‘Don’t feel bad,’ she said, blowing the botanist a final farewell kiss. ‘You’re just another victim of the clever and cute Elichika.’

* * *

Sat across from Nico in the car, Maki fidgeted in her seat once. Then twice. And then again.

Nico rolled her eyes and looked across – which might’ve been dangerous in most other cars, but that was because other cars moved at a speed which would cause damage in a collision. ‘If there’s something you want to say, say it,’ she said.

‘Is this normal?’ Maki said with concern, shifting her seating position once more. ‘I can’t find any space for my legs, and I’ve pushed the chair all the way back.’

Nico looked down at her own legs, just to be sure. ‘Nice problem to have,’ she scowled. They were in the middle of the drive back to Tokyo which was _meant_ to take two hours, in the same way that assignments are _meant_ to done a little bit at a time instead of being completed five minutes before their deadline after weeks of procrastination.

Time for a change in topic, Nico decided.

‘Care for some food?’ asked Nico. ‘There should be a bento packed in the back.’

After some rummaging, Maki brought the box into her lap and removed the lid. She eyed the container’s contents as if they were poison. ‘This looks entirely too healthy to taste good.’

Nico giggled. ‘You’re like my younger siblings back home. But Nico got used to cooking for them, and learned how to make it tasty as well. Try it – you’ll see.’

‘I have high standards,’ Maki scoffed as she brought the food towards her mouth with her chopsticks. ‘Back in Tokyo, Papa has Michelin star chefs employed for the house, and-‘

Any further words fell away as Maki chewed, a thoughtful expression crossing her face.

‘What did you say you were again?’

Making a wide grin, Nico took a hand from the wheel to flash her trademark hand-sign. (Again, inadvisable in most other vehicles.) ‘Just the Number One Spy in the Universe, at your service!’

‘Such a waste of talent,’ Maki lamented, before picking up another disposable chopstick load of food. Not knowing what to make of that comment, Nico allowed the conversation to lapse.

The sound of Maki’s quiet eating was interrupted a few minutes after. An instrumental of _Mahoutsukai Hajimemashita_ played for a few seconds before the call connected. It was a video call, with a familiar face appearing on the car’s centre console screen.

‘Hiya, Nicocchi!’ Nozomi said with a grin. ‘Did you retrieve Maki-chan?’

‘Yeah,’ Nico replied, ‘but not without incident.’

And so Nico gave her report, and Nozomi’s look turned graver and graver the more she heard about them being attacked soon after she arrived. By three figures which just seemed familiar by their _movement_ , as if that were possible. An impromptu kung-fu showdown because she had left her gun in the glovebox of a car which might also be referred to in another word ending with box, and not much else to show for it after they made their escape…

‘Oh, dear,’ Nozomi replied after Nico completed her report. ‘Is Maki-chan alright?’

‘She’s both fine and in the middle of stuffing her face with my lunch,’ said Nico.

Maki cut in, both indignant and chewing her food at the same time. ‘I am _not_ stuffing my-‘

Her sentence went uncompleted as she placed a hand to her mouth and coughed, some food evidently not finding the right pipe. Grimacing with sympathy, Nico passed Maki her own water bottle from the car’s cupholder. Maki chugged the entire bottle.

‘I just don’t get it,’ Nozomi admitted, ‘it’s strange to have been compromised so early. But still, you showed why you’re the best woman for the job, so well done.’

Nico felt the rush of a good ego stroke.

‘And now to give a report of my own,’ Nozomi continued, taking on an official air once again. ‘A break-in at the Akiba Corporation’s research labs in Okinawa. And worse, several more victims of our dear Elicchi. Of particular note, this person.’

The car’s screen flickered to show a meek woman with an ashen grey bob and a lab coat being presented with an award, smiling awkwardly at the camera. It did her a disservice, Nico thought, she’d look much prettier otherwise.

‘Rika Kamiya,’ Nozomi offered by way of explanation. ‘One of Japan’s best kept secrets in the academic world. Or she was, before that Russian fox got her hands on our files… Anyway. She’s the Akiba Corporation’s major asset, and I know Akiba herself is not happy after Eli went after her most valuable asset. The plan was for you to interview Rika and understand why Eli had targeted her and the corporation. But sadly, she isn’t up for much talking.’

‘Is she injured?’ asked Maki.

‘Worse,’ said Nozomi, ‘she’s nursing a broken heart. The hospital is running out of those small cups of ice cream and jelly to give her.’ She let out a long sigh. ‘That poor girl. Elicchi must have done quite a number on her.’

‘How do you know this is Eli’s doing?’ asked Nico.

‘Simple,’ Nozomi replied. ‘Because of the lipstick all over the guards faces. So as a result, you get two tickets to Okinawa. Congratulations!’ Nozomi paused for a moment. ‘Now unfortunately our private jet is also a no-go due to budget constraints, so you’ll have to be placed on the commercial flights.’

‘No problem,’ said Nico. ‘I’ll settle for first-class tickets instead.’

‘Errr, Nicocchi, that might be a little…’

A sigh. ‘Is it business class, at least?’

‘Guess again,’ said Nozomi.

Nico slumped her head back against the headrest. ‘Please at least tell me that it’s premium economy.’

‘I’m sorry, Nicocchi,’ Nozomi apologised. ‘Blame the bureaucracy. Report to Haneda as soon as possible and show them the voucher I’ve sent to your phone. Oh, and remember to get a receipt for afterwards for the accountants. They’re real sticklers about that.’

‘Oh for the love of… I’ll be there.’ Nico grimaced once more as she looked at the speedometer, her foot still nailed to the floor. ‘Well, sometime this century.’

As soon as she heard the call disconnect, Maki got the feeling that there would be no stopping Nico’s complaints, seeing the way she sulked behind the steering wheel. And sure enough…

‘Like one awkward trip together wasn’t enough. And we’re flying economy. This is the absolute worst.’

‘Economy… economy…’ Maki tested the words out as if they were in a foreign language, before she brightened up. ‘Oh, I’ve heard of that! I’ve never gotten to fly in it though. Tell me, is it fun?’

Taking her right hand off the steering wheel, Nico pinched the bridge of her nose. ‘This is going to be a long trip.’

* * *

Wedged into the middle seat of three, and not an especially padded seat at that, Maki twisted herself one way, then another in an attempt to get comfortable for the three-hour flight south. Her struggle was to be in vain.

‘No, no, no, this can’t be right,’ she muttered. ‘There’s nowhere to put my legs.’

Nico said nothing, instead putting in her noise-cancelling earphones and starting to play some music.

‘Ummm, Yazawa-san,’ said Maki as she looked across hopefully, ‘would it be alright if I used some of your legroo-‘

‘No.’

‘Why?! It’s not like you’re using it!’

Wondering if she was lucky or not to avoid having such problems, Nico turned up the volume of her phone’s music and pretended not to hear anything through her earphones.

After they touched down at Naha Airport three hours later, Maki’s mood was not improved when she saw the hire car that had been budgeted for by the Service’s accountants.

And even worse, the hotel room with the carpet which was stained and crusty under their feet, where the hot water was anything but, where the toilet needed multiple flushes and where the acrid scent of some previous sweat lingered, despite the 50-yen pine deodorisers that had been employed to cover it up.

It would be a long night for Nico.

* * *

The next day, they left the hotel at around 9am and began another drive, this time towards the Akiba Corporation’s laboratory situated amongst the forested mountains on the northern part of the island. The scenery was enjoyable, which was a good thing, because the 660cc engine in front of them gave them plenty of time to enjoy it.

Two hours of winding, uphill roads later, they arrived at their destination.

It was a mass of concrete which was a blight on the natural surroundings. Encircled by high, barbed-wire fences, it was akin to a military installation that you might find on other parts of Okinawa. Their ID’s were scrutinised carefully at the checkpoint leading into the facility by female guards in dark fatigues and packing serious amounts of firepower.

Having been signalled where to park their car, Nico got out, her dark charcoal suit of cotton and linen, grenadine navy tie and designer sunglasses glimmering under the sunshine. Maki, meanwhile, had opted for a matching navy blazer and skirt for the meeting.

They were led through the building’s entrance under a tight escort of guards. The brutal exterior was matched by cold, grey, concrete and tile confines which reverberated their footsteps like the inside of a cavern. At least the thick walls helped to insulate from the heat outside.

Their escort stood to attention as one as a woman made her way towards the two visitors. Tall, slender, brown hair in a bun and with pink, square-rimmed glasses, it was Akiba herself who headed out to meet them.

‘Welcome, welcome, welcome!’ she said, practically running into Nico with a hug and catching her off guard. Maki suppressed a laugh, which came out as a gasp when Akiba gave her the same treatment a split-second later.

‘I’ve heard about you both from our dear friends at the Secret Intelligence! Tojou-san said that she’d only send the best operatives for the job, and here you are! How was your trip to get here?’

‘It’s not the easiest place to get to,’ Maki observed.

‘Especially with a shoebox which can’t climb the damn hills,’ Nico added in a grumble.

‘Haha. Yes, well, I’m sure you can appreciate the need for a secure location. Industrial espionage is a key concern in this industry. But enough of the idle chat – or should I say _idol_ chat, Yazawa-san?’ Akiba said, throwing a wink Nico’s way before giggling to herself. ‘Let’s resume in my office. It’s more comfortable there.’

Akiba dismissed the guards and led the way through the long and dim corridors. Maki took care to lag far enough behind that she was out of earshot as she whispered to Nico in a hush.

‘First the car, then economy-class, a crappy hotel room and now we’re dealing with an eccentric who makes stupid puns,’ Maki groaned out. ‘I’m not being paid enough to deal with this. Stupid father owing favours to the government…’

Deeper and deeper into the structure they went, making the occasional turn to head down different, yet identical looking corridors. The labyrinthine set-up was almost certain to be deliberate, Maki thought to herself, given Akiba’s thoughts on industrial espionage…

‘Ah,’ said Akiba, making a sheepish rub at the back of her head as they passed by the one door that didn’t look like the others. Instead, there was barrier tape placed over the entrance and a guard posted beside. ‘This is the one area which is up for some impromptu renovations, I’m afraid.’

They were ushered away down another hallway – then three doors down from the end, Akiba opened a door and held it open for her guests to enter.

‘Everyone always expects it to be at the end!’

Nico stepped in first and regarded the high-backed leather chair for Akiba, and similar for her guests. A laptop and writing instruments neatly laid on the wooded desk. Beige everywhere. All safe and boring in Nico’s eyes, but at least it wasn’t purple like a certain other director’s.

It wasn’t the bland décor which caught Maki’s attention, however. In most offices people have a tendency to spread some pieces of artwork across the room to add some ambience. Instead, Maki found herself walking towards the wall and looking at colourful posters and pictures, all depicting the same subject.

‘Idols,’ Maki mused to herself. ‘ZKC48, Eau de Cologne, all the previous winners of Love Live…’

‘Hmm? Oh hey, that’s me!’ Nico pointed to the picture with excitement, before crinkling her nose as she scrutinised it closer. ‘They could’ve used a better photo. I usually look way cuter.’

Maki decided it was best to ignore Nico as she came to the final picture. A teenage woman with that familiar light brown hair and heart-shaped glasses with a microphone in hand and arm outstretched to the audience, Maki asked just to be sure. ‘And this... is you, Akiba-san?’

‘I always wanted to be an idol when I was younger,’ she explained, giving the picture a fond look, before bouncing back towards Nico and clasping Nico’s hands within hers. ‘That’s why I admire you so much as an idol, Yazawa-san! Making it big, getting to the top of such a competitive business and becoming well known across Asia and the world! It’s practically unheard of!’

‘But…’ Akiba continued before Nico could fully glow in the praise she was given, ‘you seriously expect me to believe this? A tiny little thing like you suddenly becoming a government _spy_ , and the Intelligence Service which says that _you’re_ the best they can offer me?’ Akiba winked, but there was an edge to it this time. ‘I think your idol charisma might’ve conned them a bit too much, Yazawa-san!’

‘What did you just say?’ Nico’s eyes now flared, and she made to stand up from her seat until Maki placed a hand to her shoulder and sat her back down.

‘And as for you,’ Akiba said, her teeth showing in the pointed smile she gave Maki, ‘I really have nothing against you! Apart from the fact that you’re daddy’s little princess who’s been gifted everything in life! Oh, who am I kidding. It does actually annoy me quite a bit!’

Maki’s eyes narrowed to dangerous slits, but she elected not to comment.

‘My oh my,’ Akiba lamented with a melodramatic sigh. ‘First the economy, now the politicians have found a way to screw up who they employ in their agencies.’ Akiba opened a desk drawer, pulled out a dossier and then handed it across the table. ‘Here,’ she said, sounding almost bored with the situation. ‘It’s everything you need to know about Rika’s research.’

Maki made a dubious look at the file Akiba pressed into her hands. Nico also felt the need to comment, the words coming out with sarcastic bent.

‘It’s a bit thin, don’t you think?’

‘I think I’m being quite generous,’ Akiba replied, grinning. ‘You’re only getting this much because I admire you, Yazawa-san!’

‘Look,’ Maki pressed, keeping her voice level. ‘These are matters of national security-’

‘And matters of money. Which, I note, the Intelligence Service isn’t doing so well on these days.’

‘Stupid budget cuts,’ Nico grumbled under her breath.

‘The point is that we couldn’t stop that Russian fox from breaking in and stealing what would’ve been my most valuable investment. What makes you think you can protect any information I’d give you, let alone do anything useful with it?’

‘This isn’t going to go down well with the authorities,’ Maki warned.

‘We work with all the major government agencies, and particularly the Ministry of Defence. I’m sure they wouldn’t want their business to be disrupted by anyone being arrested.’

Nico seethed. ‘Corruption.’

Akiba took a second to savour her victory with a smirk. ‘Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get everything up and running again after that damn Russian broke in. Please, feel free to explore the area! But remember, there’ll be guards around who don’t take kindly to trespassing, so do be careful!’

They weren’t quite sure how it happened, but the next thing the pair knew was that they were standing outside the office door and it was it was emphatically shut behind them.

‘That was quick,’ Maki deadpanned.

Nico was less composed, both hands clenched into fists by her side. ‘That arrogant little…!’ She grabbed Maki by the hand and began to stride. ‘Doesn’t what she said piss you off?’

‘A little,’ Maki admitted, ‘but they’re just cheap insults. I wouldn’t get angry over them.’

‘Well, I would!’ shouted Nico, stomping at the ground with a distinct lack of grace. ‘We’ll show her that we’ve gotten everything through merit! And besides, we can’t exactly save the world from Eli with what she just gave us. So we’re going to take that information for ourselves!’

‘Do I get a say in this probably illegal scheme of yours?’

‘No. Follow me.’

Maki sighed and wondered why she expected anything different. ‘Where are we going?’

‘Where do you think? The one room they said we shouldn’t go into, of course!’

They retraced their steps, only making a few wrong turns and some arguments over each other’s dubious sense of direction.

The red and white striped tape over the door waved in a slight breeze beside a woman in Akiba Corporation fatigues. A pistol holstered by her side indicated that she wasn’t placed there for show. Nico sized her up with a glance, grinned, then ignored her as she stepped towards the door.

The guard stepped to the left and blocked Nico’s progress. ‘I’m sorry, this area is off-limits.’

‘Did you think they’d just let you walk in if you looked confident enough?’ Maki asked in incredulity.

‘That’s how it usually works,’ Nico groused sidelong to Maki, ‘now I have to go to Plan B.’ Nico turned her attention back to the guard and smiled. ‘Aww, that’s okay! I’ve just been so impressed with the facilities here, and I wanted a picture with you to commemorate the occasion!’

‘Sorry,’ the guard apologised in an unapologetic tone, ‘no photos as well.’

‘Not even for a celebrity?’ Nico pressed.

Scoffing, the guard regarded the woman before her with contempt. ‘You could be the Emperor for all I care, absolutely no one is permitted-‘

Nico took off her sunglasses and winked.

‘Nico Yazawa?!’ the guard gasped. ‘O-Of course you can take a picture!’

Maki’s jaw went slack as she watched the stoic guard make some sort of pose with both hands to match Nico, who held up her camera and lined up a selfie. ‘Let’s see… the lighting would be better over here, I think. And this angle will make you prettier,’ Nico said, her voice sweeter than honey.

‘As expected of Yazawa-san,’ the guard replied with awe as they stepped away from the entrance and towards one of the rare windows lining the corridor.

Nico waved with her hand behind her back, signalling for Maki to take advantage of the distraction. Maki took the hint and crept behind the guard, before disappearing into the dimly lit confines of the laboratory itself.

‘Now then,’ said Nico. ‘One, two, three…’

‘Nico Nico Nii!’

‘I’ve been a fan of yours for so long,’ the guard gushed. ‘Ever since you made your debut as a school idol and had all of Tokyo talking about your performances, and your friendly rivalry with A-RISE!’

‘A-RISE really are amazing,’ Nico said, smiling. ‘In fact, I have some good stories to tell about Tsubasa. Would you like to hear them?’

‘Would I ever!’

‘Well now, let’s see,’ mused Nico, tapping her finger against her chin. ‘This is from when we were both students back at UTX…’

* * *

The passageway Maki went down was short and the greenhouse she entered was so well lit that her eyes took a moment to adjust from before. She blinked her eyelids shut a few times before taking in the sight.

Exotic plants surrounded Maki like a technicoloured forest. Gloves, coats and scientific measuring tools hung from the wall next to the entrance. Towards the centre of the expanse it transformed more into a laboratory than a garden, with well worked-on benches showing dark burns and stains across their surface and each plant given their own little space.

Sure enough, this was where Rika Kamiya had spent long days and nights doing her research.

Maki’s eyes fell to the expensive looking computer placed on one of the desktops. As natural a place as any to start, she figured.

She jiggled the mouse and the screen burst into life – right at the page of notes Akiba was in the middle of making the night before. So she hadn’t had the time to log out before she was so sweetly interrupted.

She took in the words and murmured. ‘ _Lilum vitrum_ , huh…?’

Skimming over the files, eyebrow arching more than once in the process, Maki now had a hunch of what it be capable of doing, and why Akiba had tried to stonewall them earlier. And why Eli had decided to take it.

But there was no way she could pore over the thousands of pages in the time that Nico had bought for her – time which was starting to run out. She fished a flash-drive from her pocket and copied them as fast as she could, opened some drawers and stuffed all the files she could into her handbag before she dashed back towards the entrance.

* * *

‘And that’s why I admire Tsubasa-san so much,’ Nico concluded. ‘Her and A-RISE mean so much to me.’

The guard brought a handkerchief to her eyes. ‘What a touching story…’

‘I agree,’ Maki said, as she skipped around the guard to stand beside Nico once more. Nico breathed a sigh of relief – Maki had returned just in time.

‘Hey, wait a second. Where were you all this time, anyway?’ asked the guard, a suspicious edge in her voice.

‘I was, umm, in the bathroom?’ Maki replied, missing the facepalm Nico made an instant later.

‘Huh,’ replied the guard, unconvinced.

Nico cut in. ‘Jeez, Maki, I told you that you shouldn’t eat that much for breakfast!’ She turned and whispered in conspiratorial tones to the guard. ‘She’s not used to the food here. It makes her stomach all…’ Nico blew an awful noise with her tongue between her lips.

The guard nodded in sympathy. ‘Say no more.’

‘Hey!’ yelled Maki, blushing red as Nico took her by the hand and began to make for the exit with brisk steps. She waved goodbye to the guard.

‘Thank you for being Nico’s fan, and I hope you always continue to support me!’

‘The pleasure was all mine!’

‘And thanks for embarrassing me back there,’ Maki hissed with anger as soon as they turned the corner.

‘Not a problem!’ Nico replied. ‘So? Please tell me Nico’s time was well-spent back there.’

‘I found these.’ Opening her bag, Maki displayed the overstuffed manila folders full of notes and annotated drawings, all jammed with enough science jargon to be another language to Nico.

‘Ooh, nice work!’ Nico squealed with delight, before latching herself across Maki’s shoulders. ‘With me doing the distracting and you doing the stealing, we make a good team!’

‘You were probably just flirting the whole time,’ Maki retorted.

‘I’m sorry,’ a third, dangerously pissed-off voice cut in. ‘Did someone say… stealing?’

Their faces frozen in place, Nico and Maki both made a slow turn to face Akiba standing behind them. Her arms were folded in front of her, her lips curled into a snarl.

‘Care to explain why you have those documents in your possession? The ones from the area which I told you in no uncertain terms was off-limits to everyone, and especially to you two?’

‘It’s quite simple, really,’ Nico said, the words rushing out at hyperspeed. ‘You see, it’s because-‘

‘GUARDS!’

‘Hey!’ Nico took Maki by the hand as they began to sprint. ‘You didn’t let me finish!’

Shoe soles clacked and reverberated again through the lengthy corridors, as the two ran towards the compound’s entrance, followed by more footsteps in pursuit. Nico was thankful she had went for some sensible leather oxfords to compliment her suit. Maki was starting to regret her sedentary lifestyle and the burning stitch in her side as Nico dragged her along like an anchor. In the background, they could hear angry chatter into walkie-talkies and the bustle of movement outside.

Nico kicked open a fire escape door, shoved Maki through it and then wedged it shut with her body weight, breathing a sigh of relief as she heard their chasers run past without noticing. She took Maki by the hand again as they edged along the building’s perimeter towards the entrance. Then a short sprint to take cover behind a remarkably convenient, if pungent-smelling garbage skip for the moment.

Maki gulped in a deep breath of air, and then regretted it a moment later as she placed a hand over her mouth and retched. When she leaned out to get some actual fresh air, she gasped, and not from needing the oxygen after running.

‘Crap,’ Maki hissed out. ‘They’ve surrounded our car!’

‘Oh no,’ Nico said in a monotone. ‘Not the car.’

Maki rolled her eyes. ‘We still need some way of getting out of here, and we need it fast.’

As she popped her head up and scanned their surroundings, Nico ran the possibilities through her head. She could always seduce one of the guards if she got them alone, and then steal one of their vehicles…

But there was a more interesting option making her way towards them, earphones in her ears and cheerfully walking through the chaos around her.

She had brown hair with it coming out from both sides like two squirrel tails, wore square framed glasses and was strikingly short (even by Nico’s standards). She would’ve looked like a punk rocker, if not for the lab coat and what looked like a spanner holstered like a gunslinger’s pistol by her hip.

But most important of all, she was walking towards a gleaming yellow, vintage, 1960’s Vespa with the keys in her hand.

Now _that_ was something Nico could work with.

When the woman was just to pass in front of the garbage skip, Nico took her off guard and yanked her into cover by the arm.

‘Hey!’ the woman protested, ‘I was just going to get lunch!’

Maki raised an eyebrow. ‘With alarms going off and guards running around everywhere?’

‘The alarms get triggered all the time here, and I’m _famished_.’

‘Well, famished,’ said Nico, ‘care to introduce yourself?’

‘My name is _Mutsuki_. Mutsuki Takamagahara. And I’m an inventor! But I work here as a chemist, specialising in petroleum and oils.’

‘Lubricants,’ observed Maki.

The woman turned bashful. ‘Those too.’

‘That explains the lab coat,’ Nico said. ‘And your pretty Vespa. Speaking of which, I really need to borrow it.’

‘What?!’ Mutsuki’s nostrils flared. ‘Who do you think you are, asking to borrow my precious baby?’

Nico tipped down her sunglasses just enough to expose her eyes.

‘Oh my god,’ Mutsuki squealed, ‘you’re Nico Yazawa! I’m such a massive fan of yours, I have all your CD’s and I’ve been to your concerts and-’

Nico wasn’t really listening at this point. Instead, she decided it was time for some tactical espionage action.

You know what they say about spies: it’s all about fast cars and faster women. And she’d already been disappointed on the car front, so surely it was fine to indulge in the second part. Nico reached into her pocket, retrieved her make-up kit and went for the red lipstick.

This puzzled the other woman. ‘Why are you doing your makeup?’ she asked.

‘So I can give a very special fan a very special treat,’ Nico replied, winking.

‘A kiss with Nico Yazawa?!’ Mutsuki squeed. ‘Oh my goodness, just give me a second to do my hair and take a breath mint and-‘

‘No time for that.’

Before she could blink, Nico had leaned in and planted a kiss on Mutsuki’s lips. An instant later, she drew back, fluttered her eyelids and made her best doe eyed look.

‘Nico needs to borrow your scooter. Pretty please?’

‘Of course,’ said Mutsuki, handing the keys to Nico.

‘Sweet! Get on the back, Maki!’ shouted Nico as she jumped onto the scooter’s flat leather seat and kick-started it. She turned around in confusion when Maki hadn’t joined her.

‘Maki…?’

Standing with her eyes wide and her jaw slack, Maki was at a loss for words.

‘You… you kissed her?’

Nico waved her off. ‘I’ll explain later. You know, when we’re not being chased! Get on!’

Maki took the hint this time, as she ran towards the scooter before her steps became more hesitant. Fed up with waiting, Nico dragged her onto the seat behind her.

‘N-Nico-chan,’ Maki stammered out, as Nico twisted to full throttle and let go of the brakes, ‘I’ve seen what happens to people who don’t wear their helmets.’

‘I don’t think we have the time to worry about that,’ Nico shouted over the buzzing roar of the tiny engine beneath them, before she rocketed the scooter into an impressive wheelie. ‘And besides, they ruin my hair!’

Guards scattered like bowling pins as Nico ran through the gears and got the scooter to full speed, not slowing down as she squeezed past the narrow checkpoint gate. A scrape of yellow paint was traded against it.

Throwing a look over her shoulder, Nico saw Akiba burst onto the scene and command guards into trucks and cars, preparing to chase them down. Nico grinned. It was time for some fun.  

Fun was not something Maki was having, however, as she screamed and held on like her life depended on it. Which it did, but it made things even more difficult for Nico to concentrate, especially when Maki wasn’t holding on to the right place. Nico found herself blushing, and not from the rush of cold wind against her face.

‘Ummm, Maki-chan? Could you please move your arms a little lower? They’re on my, ummm…’

Maki squeaked and adjusted her grip. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t notice.’

‘You didn’t notice my breasts?!’

Racing through the winding rainforest roads, the wind whipped through Nico’s twintails as they picked up speed from the downhill run. Trees and rock faces whizzed by close enough to reach out and touch as Nico saw the speed limits, and then decided they were more of a suggestion than a rule.

But for as fast as Nico could slalom the scooter down the mountain path, she knew her head-start couldn’t last. The Vespa was a good-looking machine, but not fast enough in a straight line to make the distance they needed.

‘And even worse…’

An open stretch of road ahead with no traffic around. In this terrain, the car’s straight-line speed would win out, which was confirmed with a glance in the mirror.

‘We’re sitting ducks,’ Nico murmured.

It was time to put some more training to the test.

With her left hand, Nico reached into her suit jacket for her holstered weapon and grabbed it. She glanced over her shoulder to check the distance to their chasers, lined up a shot over Maki’s shoulder, who squeaked as she ducked out of the way, and then-

‘Nico-chan!’

Nico brought her eyes forwards just in time to swerve out of the way of a speeding lorry, its airhorn blasting birds from the forest’s trees in fear. The scooter wobbled back and forth underneath them and bucked like a rodeo bull, but Nico scrambled to keep it upright with everything she had. She just about managed it when she heard metal clattering against the bitumen behind her. She cast one last look over her shoulder and lamented the loss of her now slightly dented Walther.

‘Oh, come on! I never even got to use it!’

Nico thoughts turned desperate. There had to be something else she could use. The lipstick she was given had already worked out, so maybe…

Nico make up her mind as she reached into her jacket once again, with greater care this time.

‘I only spoke with you for fifteen minutes, but don’t you dare let me down now, Honoka.’ She opened the make-up case in her pocket and pressed her fingers around in a frantic search for the one item she needed.

Found it.

‘Maki-chan! Stop muttering about how we’re going to die and take this!’

Maki took the vial that Nico passed into her hand and looked at it curiously. ‘What’s in it?’

‘Either rapid expansion foam, quick escape smoke, or highly volatile plastic explosive. So try not to drop it.’

Saying that had almost the opposite effect, as Maki nearly fumbled the potential disaster in her hands. Nico continued, oblivious to the scene behind her.

‘If I know Honoka, and I’d like to think I do, we can rely on this to do one thing.’

‘Are you friends?’ Maki shouted over the din of the engine and the wind rushing past.

‘We’ve met exactly once,’ Nico yelled in reply.

It was thankful that Nico couldn’t see Maki’s eye-roll. ‘What do you want me to do?’

‘We’re about to go over a bridge. Chuck the tube at it when we pass over!’

Maki turned her focus behind her, her heartbeat sounding in her ears. She could make out Akiba in the passenger seat of the black Mercedes-Benz as she leaned out of the car’s window and took aim…

Nico shouted out as soon as they had passed the end of the bridge.

‘Now!’

Maki threw the tube with all her might. It spiralled end over end through the air, Maki’s eyes squinting as she tracked its arc, her heartbeat sounding in her ears as time seemed to slow, not knowing what would happen next…

The tube hit the bridge dead centre. It exploded with a ferocious shockwave which nearly tipped the scooter over, but Nico again made a miraculous save by leveraging all her bodyweight. When Maki looked up after nearly bearhugging Nico to death to stay on the scooter herself, she found that the end of the bridge had been obliterated, leaving their chasers to come to a skidding halt mere inches from the precipice.

A successful escape.

Nico looked over her shoulder, took a breath of air and then whooped. ‘Nice one, Honoka!’

Maki let the tension run out of her arms as she slumped against Nico once more.

‘And good work, Maki,’ Nico was quick to add. ‘You saved us both.’ It was awkward to take her left hand off the bars and pat Maki sitting behind her, but she managed it anyways.

‘It was nothing,’ Maki mumbled, her head buried against Nico’s shoulder. It was warm and she was exhausted – that was excuse enough to let herself rest there for the moment. She closed her eyes.

As the stretch of forest came to an end, they were greeted by the expanse of the Philippine Sea stretching into the horizon, the sun hanging low in the orange sky and glimmering over the expansive water. Nico eased back on the throttle and the engine quietened. She let out an appreciative whistle.

‘What a view.’

Opening her eyes once more, Maki was inclined to agree. It almost made the whole running for their lives thing worth it. But on the slow ride back towards to city, there was something that began to press on her mind, and she didn’t know why. Something she still didn’t have an answer for.

She pressed her head against Nico’s shoulder once more and whispered, too quiet for the other girl to hear.

‘Why did you kiss that girl earlier, Nico-chan…?’

* * *

The sun was shining on Maki’s eyes when she awoke. Figures that the blinds of their crappy hotel room wouldn’t close properly in addition to its other quirks.

She placed an arm in front of her eyes to stifle the light, rolled over, then gave up trying to steal some extra z’s as she heard the sound of luggage being rummaged through in the room. Maki cast her bleary eyes at Nico, who hummed quietly to herself as she sorted through her clothes.

With how rested she looked, you wouldn’t have thought it was Maki who won their wrestling match for the room’s only bed the night before.

‘Good morning!’ Nico said, entirely too chipper for Maki’s groggy brain to appreciate. ‘Can I get you something to drink?’

‘Uugh,’ said Maki, which was as eloquent as she could be in the morning. ‘What is there?’

‘We have a kettle and the finest selection of instant coffee this side of Japan. Probably. Nico wouldn’t know, because she doesn’t drink that awful stuff, instant or otherwise.’

‘How on earth can you live without coffee,’ Maki grumbled as she set herself down into the chair. She glanced up, and found Nico still looking right at her. ‘What?’ asked Maki, her blood pressure still too low for a more refined sentence.

‘Your bed hair is amazing,’ Nico said flatly.

Maki groaned. Nico giggled, and Maki expected that much.

What she didn’t expect was Nico to then walk across and start fussing over her with a comb. Even less did she expect Nico’s hands to be so gentle as she untangled the wayward locks. That said, she probably should’ve expected the muttering of ‘Nico slept on the couch for this?’

‘Now this takes me back,’ Nico said, her voice as light as her touch with the comb. ‘You’re like my little sisters back home. I used to do this for them every day before school, the helpless little things. I just can’t help it somehow... Wait – does that make me the mothering type?’  

Maki didn’t have an answer for that. The room felt warmer somehow to her, her eyes closed and her shoulders relaxed. It was so soothing after all the adrenaline of yesterday, she could have stayed like this forever…

‘All done.’

‘Already?’ asked Maki, before her brain caught up with her mouth. ‘I mean, thanks.’

‘Don’t mention it,’ replied Nico. Her hand went up to cover some more giggles at Maki’s reaction. ‘So? What’s on the agenda for today?’

Maki gestured at the stack of folders and files she had retrieved. ‘Just some light reading. And you?’

‘Oh, Maki-chan. When you’re in Okinawa, there’s only one thing to do.’ Nico struck a dramatic pose as she closed her eyes and placed a hand to her ear. ‘Listen. Can you hear them?’

‘Hear who?’ Maki asked, warily.

‘The sound of cuties in swimsuits, of course, all wishing for someone as cute as they are to sweep them off their feet and greet them with a summer-coloured smile! When in Okinawa, you’ve gotta go to the beach!’ Beaming at Maki, Nico asked, ‘Wanna come with?’

‘I’d be delighted,’ Maki replied. ‘Just let me put the whole saving the world thing on hold for a moment while I have some fun in the sun.’

Nico clapped Maki across her shoulders. ‘That’s the spirit!’

‘I was being sarcastic!’

After the hotel door had shut and Nico had waltzed out, Maki was left alone in the hotel room. She flipped her laptop open, retrieved a notebook and pen to organise her thoughts, then started going through the gigabytes of documents she had retrieved from Rika’s computer.

Click, click. Scribble, scribble.

The room was so much quieter without Nico around.

That was good for Maki, she could work without being interrupted by that brat.

‘The sound of _cuties_ …’ said Maki, imitating Nico’s high-pitched voice as she continued writing in her notebook. ‘With a “summer coloured smile” – whatever that means. So while I’m busy working, she’s taken off to the beach, where she’ll be _flirting_ and _coquetting_ , and then…’

Maki’s pen slowed from scrawl to crawl, before it stopped entirely and left a blot of ink on the paper.

‘And then k… _kissing_ other girls, like what happened yesterday…’

She threw her pen against the desk, where it then bounced onto the carpet with a muted thud. It was a similar sound to that of Maki’s hand thumping against her own forehead a second later.

‘Why did I freeze up like that? It’s not like I haven’t seen women kissing. Especially around Rin and Hanayo… Ugh, I don’t get it at all!’

Maki pushed herself out of her chair, retrieved her pen and set it neatly next to her notebook. And after throwing her head back and sighing to the heavens, she made her way to her own overnight bag and rifled through it, all the while muttering curses at a certain black-haired spy.

* * *

Okinawa is a lot like Hawaii, say some people. A mainly subtropical set of islands with abundant coral reefs and American military installations is what Wikipedia says. At least, when you skim the hell out of the article.

This is how Maki would’ve described Okinawa if you asked her, as she set foot onto one of its many pristine beaches in search of Nico: ‘It’s nice, but I think Seychelles or Kiribati might be prettier.’

And Nico would’ve replied, ‘Oh, yes, I completely agree.’

And if you could somehow ask Nico’s mind directly to see what she really thought, it’d be something like this: ‘This is paradise filled with beautiful women! In swimsuits! Ah, what a time to be alive.’

To conveniently speak of swimsuits, Nico was in the middle of being Nico. In other words, checking out pretty women to critique their fashion sense, or at least using that as an excuse to check them out anyway. Murmuring to herself under the shade of an umbrella placed next to her deckchair with tropical drink in hand, she did a once over of the women she found interesting as they walked by.

‘Let’s see… that slender figure really works with that dark one-piece, there’s an interesting innovation on a tankini, but do any of them understand the brilliance of frills…?’

‘What on _Earth_ are you doing?’

‘I know that voice,’ Nico said, groaning as she turned around to face Maki. She paused for a moment, feeling the need to take a sip of her drink. And, of course, the need to go over Maki’s swimsuit. More than once.

A conservative cut top in soft purple, just enough to draw out her eyes, with a few horizontal white pinstripes for style. The bottom was a navy colour skirt, _just_ long enough, with a ribbon tied on the side. Simple, thoughtful and effective. A solid 8.5/10 on the Nico scale.

And that was before the model’s multiplier kicked in.

But Maki could look pretty without even trying, and she probably hadn’t. Not with the Nishikino’s access to all those hospital riches.

She wasn’t like Nico, who had grown up exploring every store in Tokyo to get just the right sort of frills: the most important part of the less-endowed woman’s arsenal. A triumph on engineering, a genius feat of design, a technique to conceal one’s own size (or the lack thereof) and provide the illusion of greater surface area! It had to have been a woman who came up with the idea to put ruffles on swimsuits, because if it were a man they’d be famous.

And its brilliance would probably be lost on Maki, even if Nico explained it to her.

Nico clicked her tongue in annoyance. Then she found Maki looking at her. Why was Maki looking at her? Was Nico finally getting checked out now, or-

‘So?’ asked Maki, arms crossed in front of her. Ah, boredom, Nico realised. ‘What are we going to do? I could do with lounging around and reading something fun in these deckchairs.’

Nico’s eyes went downwards once more. ‘Somehow, I don’t feel like lounging beside you in a deckchair. How about a nice stroll along the shore instead?’

‘Sounds good,’ said Maki. She was proud that she only flinched a little bit as Nico happily linked their arms together, before they headed to the shoreline.

To anyone watching them, they would’ve looked like any other couple holidaying at the beach. The thought was unbecoming to Maki. Surely she’d have better taste in women than Nico.

But to be fair, Nico did look sort of cute in her frilly swimsuit. That was before mentioning how toned she was after years of training – Nico hadn’t been lying when she was boasting back then. Firm arms and legs, defined abdomen, she probably had a lot of stamina as well-

‘Um, Maki-chan?’ Nico cut in. ‘Why are you staring at me?’

 _I was staring?_ Maki thought to herself.

 _I was staring?!_ Maki thought to herself, but louder.

With a scream which drew some rather confused looks from the people around her, Maki took a running jump into the water to cool her hot-running thoughts. And with some success as well, because the water was damn cold. When she stood up in the water and flipped the damp hair out of her eyes, her arms were held across her chest and she shivered.

It was a small price to pay to take her mind off Nico, if just for a second.

Speaking of which, where was Nico after all that? Maki did just run off all by herself…

‘Ah! I’m so sorry!’

‘It’s fine, it’s fine!’ Maki heard Nico reply to the woman.

Maki’s jaw dropped as she looked over her shoulder. ‘She’s flirting with someone already?!’

That ‘someone’ had long, flowing blonde hair which reached down her back – but a different shade to Eli’s, shining dark gold underneath the Sun. Not to mention the hazel eyes and the height difference.

So she wasn’t Eli. Which meant that she fell into Nico’s ‘cutie’ category.

‘I’m sorry that I hit you with my beachball!’ she apologised. ‘But I was distracted! Your swimsuit is just perfect – the frills are so chic!’

‘I know, right!’ Nico was practically bouncing up and down by this point. ‘Ah, to think I’ve finally met someone who appreciates good swimwear!’

‘Looking at you, I can appreciate more than the swimwear,’ the woman replied with a wink, and Nico’s smile spread even further. ‘May I ask for your name?’

‘I’m a little bit famous,’ Nico said as edged her sunglasses down, ready to do her party trick once more. ‘Do you recognise me?’

‘Oh my god,’ the woman squealed, ‘it’s Nico Yaza-‘

Nico quickly reached out and stifled the woman’s mouth with her hand. ‘Shhhhh,’ she whispered, throwing a conspiratorial glance around her to make sure no-one else had noticed. ‘We don’t want the whole beach to find out, do we?’

The woman nodded, her eyes still wide and star-struck. It was an expression Nico enjoyed as she went on the offensive this time.

‘I’m taking a break from the idol work. Right now, I’m an expert in keeping secrets.’ She returned the wink. ‘Would you like to be one of them?’

The blonde giggled and reached a hand towards Nico’s. ‘I think that sounds quite interestin-‘

‘Sorry,’ an annoyed voice cut in, its owner snatching Nico’s hand into her own. ‘I need to borrow my partner for a moment.’

‘Maki? What are you- Ow, ow, ow, my hand!’ With a wince, Nico waved her hand around a few times to get the feeling back into it, then immediately regretted her decision. She glared at Maki, oblivious to the blonde watching them with a confused look on her face. ‘What are you doing?! Nico is a delicate creature, like truffles or beluga caviar!’

Maki blinked. ‘Those are delicacies.’

‘Whatever! What do you think you’re doing, interrupting my precious flirting time with beach cuties?’

‘I, ummm…’

Now that Nico asked, what _was_ she thinking, when she had stamped her way out of the tide and locked onto Nico like she had a set of crosshairs on her? Maki fumbled for something, anything.

‘I just realised something important,’ she settled on.

Nico tapped a finger against her forearm with impatience. ‘And that is?’

‘I can’t swim,’ said Maki. ‘Please teach me.’

Nico’s look went from annoyance to pure confusion. ‘But I just saw you emerge from the sea like Ursula Andress-‘

‘Teach me,’ Maki repeated, already dragging Nico by the hand towards the shoreline.

‘Hey, wait a second! Maki!’ After a brief moment of struggle which got her nowhere, Nico eventually resigned herself, turning her head back towards the blonde in apology. ‘Um, I’ll see you around later, I guess?’

‘Oh.’ All the blonde could do was stand and watch, dumbfounded, as Nico was dragged through the crowds and off into the distance. ‘Er, bye then.’

With nothing else for her to do, she made her way across the beach to retrieve her belongings, then headed to the changing room stalls and locked the door behind her. It was there that she pulled off her wig, removed her hair cap that was underneath, then let down the hair she had braided and wrapped around the top of her head to create the disguise. After that, she fished the hazel coloured contacts out of her eyes and set them into their case.

Au naturel, the woman had brown hair down to her shoulder blades and eyes of dull purple.

‘Tch!’ she muttered, her left wrist raised close to her mouth. On that wrist was a silver bangle, a closer inspection of which revealed concealed buttons and a grille which housed a miniature microphone and transmitter. ‘I’m sorry. That stupid redhead got in the way.’

‘We saw,’ came the reply from the group’s leader.

‘The same girl from last time,’ said another voice. ‘I wonder what she has to do with Nico?’

‘Something to research for later. But more importantly,’ said the leader, her voice dropping into smug and sinister tones. ‘She’s an interesting girl. I think we just might be able to use her.’

As she moved to undress out of her swimsuit, the former blonde smirked to herself in sweet satisfaction.

‘Just you wait, Yazawa-san. You won’t be so lucky next time.’

She changed into the set of clothes she had brought with her, then donned an oversized pair of sunglasses and a wide-brimmed sunhat. There was no recognising the woman who stepped out of the changerooms as the same person who had stepped in, as she strode with confidence to the rendezvous point with her colleagues.

* * *

With the fingers of both hands entwined with Maki’s, Nico stood in the shallow waters as Maki ‘practiced’ her kicking form.

‘Isn’t it weird not being able to swim, when you have a house by the beach?’ asked Nico. She cast a glance towards the beach, but couldn’t sight the blonde from before. That was a pity, things had been going so well…

‘Oh, you know,’ Maki replied, doing her best impression of an injured whale in the water. ‘Swimming is a lot of effort. I prefer to just lounge in the sunshine and look pretty.’

‘Well, you certainly do that,’ Nico muttered under her breath.

‘What?’

‘N-Nothing!’ Nico coughed and looked over Maki’s shoulder, then gasped as she pointed into the distance. ‘Oh, I think I see a fin over there!’

‘Eep!’ squealed Maki, as she launched into a perfect freestyle and made the shoreline in a time that would’ve impressed Rin.

Nico watched her with a bemused look. ‘She’s a quick learner.’

* * *

Around halfway up the boardwalk as she absentmindedly fiddled with her smartphone, the formerly disguised woman looked up too late as she bumped into a person headed in the opposite direction.

‘I’m sorry,’ apologised a stranger with long, platinum-blonde hair (probably not a wig) and sky-blue eyes. Clearly a foreigner, the other woman thought – European, perhaps? But Europeans didn’t usually bow and apologise in perfect Japanese like the stranger, with not even a trace of an accent in her voice…

The former blonde gave it a passing thought as she made a bow of her own. ‘No, it was my fault for not paying attention. I’m sorry for inconveniencing you.’

The stranger gave a warm smile, still bowed. ‘It’s not a problem.’

As the other woman made a polite exit to meet with the two friends that were waiting for her, Eli’s smirk became more sinister. She flicked open the wallet she had taken from the woman’s bag after ‘conveniently’ bumping into her, her eyes flitting over the cards inside.

‘It’s not a problem at all, Anju Yuki-san.’

* * *

‘Excuse me, madam,’ said the police officer as Nico and Maki returned to their hotel. The officer happened to be standing next to a bright yellow Vespa SS 180 from the 1960’s. ‘Is this your scooter?’ she asked Nico. ‘The receptionist said that she saw you riding it around last evening.’

‘I, ummm…’ Nico shot Maki a desperate look. ‘Help me out here?’

The officer likewise turned to Maki. ‘Do you know this person, madam?’

Maki weighed up her options, taking a moment to savour Nico’s pleading, begging face.

‘I’ve never seen her before in my life.’

‘Maki-chan?! Oh, come on!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why Okinawa, you might ask? I actually did a lot of thinking about where to set this arc. When I went to the Phillipines on holiday and met my uncle and aunt who live in Okinawa, that made me do some more research, and then that was it...
> 
> (And then I made a Natsuiro reference, then discovered that the PV of Natsuiro is probably set in Okinawa anyway, given the names of the audio dramas on the CD…)
> 
> This Nico is pretty much her manga version aged up a little. I wasn’t trying to do that, but I guess it’s too strong within my subconscious.  
> So yeah! How long will it be before the next arc gets completed? Answer: too long.


End file.
